Why remarry an ex spouse

But eventually they each ended their respective relationships, and became a couple. During the 20 years of their first marriage, there were many stressors: Violette was launching businesses, he was renovating a home and also had a day job. We were both taking issues out on one another and it was no longer healthy for our kids or for us.

They divorced and remained so for about a year and a half while still living together. Violette was traveling in Europe when she realized how much she missed her husband.

They came back together, and dated secretly at first. After six months, we realized that there was more love between us than ever before. It gave us the freedom to grow up, heal, and find our own solid ground. He is more focused on the family, on me and our marriage. The divorce was the biggest blessing even though it was absolutely horrible.

But there is no way we would be where we are today had we not separated. Building it back from the ground up gave it a strength that you only embrace while acknowledging the power of the foundation. It was starting anew but with profound layers that can only be developed through decades of love. You have the choice to move forward with love and forgiveness or to move forward in hate and anger. If we choose love, a beautiful new level of connectivity may just surprise you.

People who have worked through profound pain from a relationship know that getting to a deeper, better place requires a lot of self reflection, professional help, and meditation or prayer. If infidelity is involved, Kearney emphasizes the importance of first truly accepting that the affair is over. But if a relationship is meant to come back together after dissolution — because of cheating, or another reason — it can only be mended when both partners are willing to do the work of looking inward.

The most important thing to keep in mind is to stay positive. If you start to listen to what they say, you will begin to believe in it yourself and your marriage may suffer because of it.

Instead, thank your loved ones for their concerns, assure them you both plan to work hard on your relationship this time around, and would appreciate the support.

If you think that restoring your marriage to your ex-spouse is the best decision for everyone involved, you should also realize that the task requires large amounts of work. In the end, however, with your entire family living together under the same room, you may just find that everyone is happier. Statistics Regarding Restored Marriages Statistics for restored marriages, where ex-spouses remarry each other, may be somewhat surprising.

Reunited Dr. Reasons People Want to Remarry a Spouse There are many different reasons why spouses decide to get back together. Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder Sometimes couples do not realize exactly what they mean to each other until they have divorced.

Time to Reflect Makes Anger Dissipate It can be much easier to reflect on the relationship when you take time away from it. The Grass May not Be so Green Some people think that things are always better - that the grass is greener - anywhere else but in their current situation. Personality Changes and Renewed Love People change as they grow older, but this does not mean that couples have to grow apart.

Accepting Culpability Often times, one or both spouses is hesitant to recognize their contribution to the disintegration of a marriage. Changed Behavior So often, Solomon says, couples tend to justify and rationalize their behavior or their former spouse's behavior without ever taking steps towards actionable change.

Changed Expectations Often times, one of the factors in a marriage's downfall is that one or both partners have unrealistic expectations. Steps to Take to Make Remarriage Work Some things can increase the chances for success in marriage the second time around. Seeking Counseling You don't want to start your relationship with the same issues you had before.

Remember You Are Marrying the Same Person Even though you and your mate may have changed over the years, there are likely still some ways you are the same. Be Prepared for Hard Work Being married, and restoring a marriage in particular, requires lots of work and effort. Consider Creating a Prenuptial Agreement Many people who remarry their ex-spouse decide to use a prenuptial agreement to protect themselves.

Staying Positive When you marry your former spouse, you may hear a lot of ridicule from family members and friends. Restoring Your Marriage If you think that restoring your marriage to your ex-spouse is the best decision for everyone involved, you should also realize that the task requires large amounts of work. Ways to Reconcile After a Divorce. Steps to Marriage Separation Reconciliation. By Gabrielle Applebury.

Historical Divorce Rate Statistics. In their grief, they began talking again. Chris relocated to the UK to be closer to his daughter, divorcing his second wife in the process. Spending more time with Dee confirmed what Chris had suspected: divorcing her had been the greatest mistake of his life.

I was very headstrong. As Dee had remarried, Chris kept his distance. But in , his daughter told him some momentous news: Dee and her second husband were separating. You look at Mum, and I can see. They reunited later that year. If you believe our personalities are immutable, it is hard to explain why some couples get a do-over.

Surely the issues that tanked your relationship the first time around will scupper it again? But the passage of time causes people to mellow. With maturity comes patience and tolerance. And back then, Dee was very quiet and passive. We just blended straight away.

Those who have been given a second chance at lost love know not to take anything for granted. You have to work at relationships; a little bit every day. But not all second chances have picture-postcard happy endings. The ragged, impersonal contours of fate may throw your love back into your life for a while, before wrenching them away. After reconciling, Chris and Dee spent five happy years together.

They holidayed abroad, and had date nights looking after their grandchildren. In January , Chris decided to surprise Dee by proposing to her the following month, on her birthday. He commissioned a replica of her wedding band from a local jeweller. She had sold the original, when times were hard. The ring was still being made when Dee began complaining of a headache one Sunday evening in bed. She went to the bathroom to be sick.

Chris heard her slump to the floor. It was a body blow. How many guys get that, a second chance with their first love? And it was absolute, pure delight.